Twelve Years Sober

776eaf4719ddaa1fb1d210fa91a956e5_screenI might be guilty of bragging, but that’s fine. Some things are worth bragging about every day. Being clean and sober is one of them. It might be difficult to understand if you’ve never been on the giving or receiving end of this type of hell. That makes you fortunate.

But, I am fortunate, too.

I am fortunate to have been through hell and come out filthy on the other side. I went through all that shit to make me a stronger person and to help others get through their own version of hell.

That is what this life is all about. Helping others. I don’t get to give up because as much as I might want to, or as much as I might feel my life is all my own and that it is no one else’s business what I do, that is an inaccurate statement.

I am doing this whole Law of Attraction thing and though it feels like nothing is giving and nothing is sparkly, I am learning that I am still on my path. I am learning that despite once feeling guilty about everything that ever happened to me, I am okay. I am the master of my universe. I am the creator of my life. I have a vibration that attracts things. The essence of that which is like unto itself is drawn.

I used to write about my sobriety here but stopped because I was busy with other things and there were already so many great websites and blogs about living sober I figured I would be better off helping people in other ways, and so I did.

If you are going through it, keep going. You’re going to be okay. If you need help and have to where to turn, go to one of these links to get started. AA NA

Guilty

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Disappear

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Screams, so decrepit

Disappear into the light

Breathe, never again

 

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/disappear/

 

Image: pixabay

Awkward Moments

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A life riddled

With awkward moments

Passionate

Extreme

So many tales

Tears and laughter

Grief and satisfaction

Photogenic reminiscences of a life endured

Of love suffered

Moments of agony wrapped in splendor

Only awkward felt reasonable

*~*~*~*~*~*~*

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/awkward/

Image: Pixabay

Premature Love

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Oh how I wanted to love you

Long and lonely like a lost sunbeam

You floated by

Like a wish in the sky

I was blatant and early

You were shameful and  hollow

There were too many shadows

Not enough heart

So we picked up our scabs

Jogged back to start

Our premature nature

Soaked in a private endeavor

Now we’ve bled apart

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/premature/

Image: Pixabay

Abrupt End to Negativity

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I have been studying Abraham Hicks and Rhonda Byrne and all of the other greats regarding manifesting and centering on my well being and I have to say, it is helping me a lot. This has been four days in a row now that I have kept my cool and centered myself in times of challenge, and in times of challenge, I mean driving in rush hour traffic. Okay, so other areas as well, but with an hour long drive (one way) to work each day, it was getting annoying and now I have figured out a way to just let shit be what it is and detach from the outcome.

I am also learning that my energy is a direct reason for the shit that surrounds me. I know that might sound preposterous to some, but for me, it is working. I can’t say that I never feel any type of negative emotion, but I am learning how to let it pass through me instead of camping out in my being.

Today is May 2nd and although I started this new journey in April, I am counting each day in May to see how I feel on May 31.

I passed both my classes in school, so now I only need six more credits to get my Associate’s in Art.

I can now dedicate my time to writing my fourth book while going over edits for my first one.

I am excited about life! ❤ Have a wonderful day! There is a poem below.

Abrupt

You left without a look

As you spoke without a word

Twisted and tormented

I seized the moment 

Screamed your name

Hopped inside your soul

Together we can fall

Into this or nothing at all

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/abrupt/

Poetry Through Recovery

So, I was sitting at my desk trying to figure out what to do next and it hit me like a baseball in the sun.  Write about my journey through addiction and recovery. Not the whole thing mind you, parts are pretty boring, but some aren’t. The last year of my addiction and pieces of my recovery are insane, funny and downright heartbreaking.

 

Poetry Through Recovery (1)
Coming June 15, 2018

I mean, I wrote most of my story once, but the whole thing in itself really isn’t fit for human consumption, so this time, on a second go around, I decided to share some of the gritty parts.

People love gritty parts.

Yes, it is called Poetry Through Recovery, but it won’t be all poetry. There will be some personal essays and some funny anecdotes. Just real shit that could maybe help a trainwrecked soul like myself. I did a survey a while back and most people seemed to want to hear about a piece of my life that revolved around living at a place called The Wagon Wheel when I was an eighteen-year-old pregnant mother of two with a crackhead husband.

Trust me, that story is coming. But for some reason, I feel like I need to write this other one first. There is kind of a parallel there, so to speak. When I lived at the Wagon Wheel, I was sober, but living among drunks, addicts, and absolute chaos. Fast forward ten years and it was the same old story, except now I was the drunk asshole. Stories like this – like my story – help people. Maybe I’ll lace Poetry Through Recovery with pieces of the Wagon Wheel. At this point, I feel like I have to.

It’s the only way it’ll all make sense. And sometimes, we need shit to make sense.

Have a blessed day.

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/parallel/

 

Disrupt Your Routine

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I work for a CPA firm. CPAs are an interesting breed as they detest any type of change. I am surprised they even do electronic returns. Though, thinking back, it was resisted with much venom until electronic returns were mandated. Still, they found a way around it.

I digress.

Disruption is often suspicious when it comes to the daily to and fro of our lives – the lives of our children and pets for sure – because in routine is where comfort lies. But nothing grows without resistance and disruption. Disruption gets a bad rap because it’s inserted in statements like, “Joey, stop disrupting the class.” or “You’re disrupting the baby’s naptime.”

But, what about when we disrupt our own routines? Like, maybe you always write at the kitchen table, or walk down the same street after dinner or have the same freaking coffee (half-caff, venti with skim milk, and six Splenda) at the same coffee shop every single effing day. What does coffee with six Splenda taste like, anyway? What if you change it up? What would that look like?

It really is when we forced into change that it has the most profound effect. For me, change can be fun when I want to do it; other times, it sucks. When it sucks is when I make the most changes.

I always write the same stuff: poetry, memoirs, dramas. But what if I just throw my papers in the wind and say: Hey, why don’t I try to write a horror story? Or maybe a romance? I mean, I wrote a super creepy story about a misfit and a bag of money and it turned out pretty decent.

So… why don’t we give it a shot?

Let’s try it: I want whoever is reading this to write a blog post outside your comfort zone. If you write scary stuff? Try romance. Are you a poet? Write a short story about something. Horror writer? Write a short sappy something. Put your link in the comments here and I’ll check them out… and hopefully, other commenters will check out some links, too.

So, write something you’d never think to write, post to your blog, link in the comments.

🙂

Update on my novel: it is with a real live editor! Yes… and then I get it back and make the changes and then… submit! Woohoo! I am so excited about this story.

Think it. Believe it.

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/disrupt/

Disrupt

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