Could we be getting any more ridiculously politically correct? Holy hell, everyone is offended by everything these days. What happened to not liking something and just getting on with life?
Anyway, since the new norm is to be habitually offended, I decided I am going to disobey it. I used to be offended long before it was a trend and after careful thought realized I was miserable all the time because of it.
I now think for myself! It is beautiful and wonderful and I feel so much better forming my own opinions rather than getting in that row of sheepy sheepletons.
No offense to anyone who follows a trend, crowd, idea, etc… it just hasn’t worked for me and I am trying something new.
How is everyone doing these days? If you are in an area that got hit by the hurricane, I am especially rooting for your triumph!
School started back up and if you are a regular follower of my site here, you know that means I won’t be around as much. 😦 Bummer I know… I will try to get on here a couple times a week. I thought my one class was going to be a piece of cake, and the material is fairly easy, but the amount of time I have to invest in the class is more than I anticipated. But the good news is school is finite like everything else in the world.
Well, you know what they say about assume and all.
So, finiteis the word of the day.
Can we think of even one instiance of legitimate infinity? Everything is finite except for the universe I believe. Inclulding the accesibility of this site here. I just read it will be down for maintenance for a week! That kind of works in my favor because by then I will have a good handle on my classes and know exactly how often I can post here. Hopefully, I can get a couple entries pre-written.
Cruel, finite love
Your shallow grave sooths my soul
There were others, you know
By the way, you can find me on Facebook at Darlene Steelman McGarrity… I write stuff on there, too. But when you request me, be sure to tell me you’re from WordPress or I most likely won’t accept the invitation (lots of spammers on FB).
I haven’t been around… not sure who noticed. And no, it isn’t some silly game. I started school this week; two seven-week progressive courses which are essentially fifteen weeks smashed into seven.
I mean, I have a mid-term in two weeks. I am still writing as much as I can but I left the day job at 1 pm Wednesday to go get my textbooks and catch up on some studies.
I guess you could say I am as busy as a bumble bee.
In other news, my area, Bucks County, has some serious murder mystery stuff going on! Four young men went missing last week and there are connections to another young man who is the son of farm owners in the Solebury section of the county.
The ground was dug up with a backhoe where cadaver dogs sniffed out the scent of human remains buried over twelve feet beneath the surface. I cannot imagine the mentality of someone who would go through so much trouble to bury a body that far underground! I won’t go into detail, as you may have already heard the story. I feel sad for the families of these young men.
Finally, I am looking forward to this weekend. Getting caught up on my studies and focus on the end game which is an associate’s degree! I have the grit to pull it off for sure. I have been dragging my ass on finishing school since I started way back in 2001. I was gung ho for a couple years and managed to get 36 credits, but then I had that whole issue with the drugs and drinking and despite getting sober in 2006, still didn’t pursue my goal.
Well, things go the way they go for whatever reason and I am excited to finally be back in the game.
Do you have any goals (long or short-term) you are currently pursuing?
Have a great week! I will try to write something creative once I get caught up on my studies this weekend.
When I was little, I was a kid. And when I was a kid, I did things because I wanted to do them. I had no insurgent idea about right and wrong or good and bad.
I just was.
Others instilled inside of me the fears, doubts, hopes, dreams, love, hate, good and bad that leaked inside me and I carried this into society as I grew.
That’s how it goes.
One day, I was standing in my grandmother’s yard, awed by the beauty of flowers by the front step. Their bright petals with the dark colored faces stunned my thoughts as I stood motionless; the beauty captivated my little mind and I needed to be closer.
I bent down and smelled the brilliant blooms and just like that, I plucked the delicate flower from its bed.
I plucked it for my own selfish needs – for no other reason. I just wanted it.
I stole its little life.
I skipped away with my new trophy.
I would steal flower lives intermittently as my life swirled and changed. They were so pretty, so magical.
I wanted to be like the flowers I picked.
Then one day long after that day…
It didn’t matter how many flowers I picked.
They would always die. And so would my happiness.
Later, after many withered flower carcasses…
I let the flowers just be – as I just was – and I would visit them.
My grandmother was my weekend sidekick as we drove all over Northeast Philly and Bucks County, PA on ‘outings’ to mystical places like New Hope, PA, and Clover on Frankford Avenue. We were in the Acme on Torresdale Avenue across from Lindenfield projects (they have since been torn down) and we went through the usual routine. Gram would get food for the weekend along with whatever I wanted. All I had to do was ask.
“Gram, can I get these people snack crackers?” I asked her once excited at the fact of me being able to ingest mini, crunchy people.
“People don’t taste very good,” I garbled between crunches. I ate two of them before I read the box and figured out that they were dog biscuits.
Clearly, I needed therapy long before it became a thing.
Once, we were in the checkout line and I eyeballed rows upon rows of Snickers, Milky Way, M & M’s chocolate candies along with boxes of colorful gum. Oh, the gum! There were skinny seven-stick packs of minty stuff stamped Wrigley and then the best of all: Chicklets and Bubblicious! There were these little snack packs of gum that came in a yellow pouch. I forget what they were called but they were eye catching.
This day my eye was drawn to a pack of watermelon Bubblicious. I stared at it for a good two minutes, imagining a big, juicy wad of that gum in my mouth, sticking to my tiny teeth as the scent of fake watermelon wafted to my nostrils while drool puddled at the corners of my mouth.
I looked at my grandmother who was busy putting groceries on the conveyor belt. I looked behind me. No one there and on either side of me was racks of candy and magazines.
I could hear my heart beating as I snatched the watermelon wonder off the rack and slid it in my shorts pocket. I looked around again. No one was staring at me. No sirens or alarms rang. No dog came charging down the aisle with gnashing teeth ready to bite off my thieving hand.
I played it cool. I did it. I got away with theft. I was a bonified genius.
We went out to the car, loaded the groceries, got in and before we even pulled out of the parking lot, I decided… I wanted a piece of my new gum.
Bonified genius my ass…
I pulled it out of my pocket unwrapped a piece and popped it in my mouth. It was glorious! It tasted better than I had imagined and I truly had little drool pockets at the corners of my mouth. I smiled and looked at my grandmother who was staring me down which made me super uncomfortable.
“Where did you get that?” she asked me calmly.
I just kept staring at her like a corrupt criminal under the blazing spotlight of degradation while I flipped through a catalog of excuses in my mind.
“Darlene, did you steal that gum?” she asked in the same calm voice.
My catalog was empty, after all, I was seven. I had no justification except, “I wanted it.”
Again in her same calm voice, “I am so disappointed in you,” she said and pulled out of the parking lot and onto the street.
The gum, now rancid and bitter, sat in the cheek of my mouth as we drove home. I looked out the passenger window filled with shame and discomfort. My eyes welled with tears but I wouldn’t let them fall. I had to get rid of this gum. Just holding it – my tainted prize of pushing boundaries – felt dirty.
I threw the gum in the trash (chewed piece too!) as soon as we got home. I never stole anything again.
Hard lessons stick the best… sometimes better than stolen gum.