Bewildered

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Bewildered. Floored. Muddled. Thunderstruck. You get the gist.

That is me since I released my first publication in December 2017. Now, to be fair, only .000000001% of the world population even knows I exist and when you look at those numbers, the fact that ten people bought ebooks, 37 people downloaded free copies and 3 people bought physical copies (I bought the other ten) is pretty effing good. It’s even better since I absolutely suck at self-promotion. I always feel like I am annoying people, being a nag… you know, like a gnat only bigger.

Bzzzzz………………………..

I just need to get this idea out of my head that I annoy people when I tweet, FB, Pinterest, Google+, or LinkedIn a link to my book. I think I also need to realize I am comparing myself and my stats to other people and I need to stop doing that. Like, now.

And I don’t mean poets like Maya Angelou or Emily Dickenson (is there any comparison, really?); more like poets I see on Amazon in the same category as me. But I have to put it in perspective to keep my sanity. Who the hell knows how long their books have been for sale? I mean, who the hell do I think I am? My book has literally been available for nine weeks.

There are so many doors of opportunity for me and patience, hard work, and determination will help me get through whichever I choose. That I know. I cannot give up.

When I first started this blog/site in 2007, it was actually called The Daily Woman and it was my daily posts about how to do great things. I did that about a year despite my lack of commitment along with my severe lack of networking and marketing skills. No one was interested in anything I had to say.

So, I made it a blog about addiction and kept the name. Despite the fact that there are hundreds if not thousands of blogs and websites about addiction, my story was unique. So I shared my journey through addiction and sobriety with everyone. I stuck with that a while and met some really great people that I maintain friendships with today. But like I said, everyone was talking about it and in such a dynamic way, my site was basically just a “Living Sober” testament that it could be done.

Then, I just stopped. For a good two years. I went outside, stretched in the sunlight, and broke up with my boyfriend of six years after I realized how toxic he was.

But I still had to write. I couldn’t not write.

So I made DAMSWriter after a great presentation I watched by Jeff Goins. And here I am. Still sober, still goofy, and still writing.

Maybe my bewilderment is based on fear… I mean, I let most of myself out in my writing, but I have yet to let all of me out in my writing. What would that look like? Should I really write the same way I journal? Hmmm…

I am working on the second book of poetry – not giving up! Also, still working on Consequences, which I hope everyone will love as much as I do. ❤

Thank you to every single person who bought or downloaded a free copy of Poetry Through Darkness. It truly means so much to me! You all rock.

via Daily Prompt: Bewildered

Image: Pixabay

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/bewildered/

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Puzzled Petulance

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Puzzled are the few who walk the lonely path

Damaged senses overtake

Dubious; the many who hold the key to vengeance

Silence feels like a cloaked friend

Shaking down the dark is how I live my nights

And feeling up the stars keeps it all serene

There is no sound like the cries of the forsaken

Warriors are born in unkempt places

My scars are my armor

As I walk this puzzled journey

Petulant, maybe

Yearning, forever

Image: Pixabay

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/puzzled/

Allergic

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Image: Pixabay

All the drama; weak

Allergic to the wheel burn

Save it for next time

I know haikus are generally about nature, but sometimes I like to make them about human nature… I am allergic to drama in real life.

Keeping it short today. A few others bought a copy of my poetry book, so thank you for that!

All my followers rock! I am so grateful for your support.

Happy Friday!

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/allergic/

Treat Yourself

 

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Image: Pixabay

Treat yourself to something that makes you feel good; feel wonderful; feel alive! Work on something fun and delightful. Take a nap, make some coffee, go for a walk and look at some freezing streams somewhere. Get a manicure, buy a book, write a book. Whatever it takes to be kind to you.

 

Do you treat yourself, ever? Well, you should. It is a new year and a time for new beginnings and new goals but it is also a time for a new you and a new way of thinking. It is a time to lighten up on yourself (just a little) so you can go after what you want, make your dreams come true and treat yourself every day to a life you crave.

Happy 2018 everyone. My book did well when it was free and has now fallen below the Top 100, but that is okay! It is my first publication… I am not worried. I will prosper and treat myself to amazing days in 2018.

Today is a treat

Of a day forever held

Kiss the sunshine love

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/treat/

Shrooms Man…

 

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Image: Pixabay

Real quick: I love fried mushrooms with a nice, juicy steak. Other than that, not really. But every time I hear the word MUSHROOMS, I think of some skit like Cheech and Chong as they said, ‘Shrooms man, f**king shrooms.’ Though after thinking about it, I am pretty sure it was Dennis Leary in a stand-up routine Lock ‘n Load.

 

The mushrooms in the picture, however, are apparently little homes for little gnome folk! Or maybe Smurfs. I used to watch the Smurfs when I was a kid… I think they came onto the cartoon scene right about the time I was wrapping up with it.

 

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Image: parrygamepreserve.com

 

Anyway, how was your week? How much did you accomplish? I am 40,000 words into my NaNoWriMo novel, so I am hoping to be done by this weekend. Of course, it is 40,000 words of pure crap, but it is 40,000 words none the less and at the very least a blueprint in which to work with.

Wahoo!

Haiku Ode to a Fungus

Mushroom, oh fungus

You are delicious when fried

But not so healthy

Have a great weekend!

via Daily Prompt: Mushroom

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/mushroom/

First Week Down

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NaNoWriMo 2017 is in full swing. I am plugging way fairly well as I have written every day for seven days and have written over 23,000 words to date. That is a little over 3,000 words a day.

I do it this way every time and here is why. Something could possibly come up that will stray me from my word count path. So I over prepare just in case.

My current work is called ‘Rock Bottom in Seventeen Months’ and is about my struggle with addiction, alcoholism, and trying to be a mother.

So far I have had to stop writing twice to go have a good sob about all the devastation I left in my wake.

FAINT

Your eyes held shadows of demons

With their dark and sultry gaze

The faint hint of cruelty

Flecked inside their distant ways

Some would call you callous

Others might call you cruel

But I just called you hollow

Like someone I once knew

We passed on the street last night

Eyes locked long and bruised

We both knew the pain we caused

We both knew how we were used

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/faint/

©2017 DAM Steelman

Orange You Glad…

 

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http://www.zazzle.com

 

Knock Knock. 

Who’s there?

Banana.

Banana who?

Knock knock. 

Who’s there?

Banana.

Banana who?

Knock knock. 

Who’s there? 

Orange who? 

Orange you glad I didn’t say banana?

This was a classic joke when I was in grade school! We’d crack up every time. Do you remember this joke?

I’m all over the place today… I go on vacation from the day job at 1:00 pm today and will not be back until 8:30 am on Monday, November 6th! I got plans for writing, traveling, cemeteries and photography.

Also, decluttering! And maybe some naps.

I am trying to write this damn memoir, but everything is pouring out of me in little piles of shit and it is frustrating the hell out of me. I guess I should just write it down. I started one before, but that one is more of an autobiography and I am not famous enough (yet!) for anyone to give a shit about my entire life. But I wrote until I got to the really hellish part and then stopped.

Now that is where I feel I need to focus to finish this process of healing.

So.

I got tunes and coffee lined up for my writing projects (I told you I am doing NaNoWriMo, yes?) to complete another book!

Have a great day my friends. I will see you from time to time next week.

Orange is the sky

Filled with somber tomorrows

Burn the hope inside

 

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/orange/