Day 2 – Pretending

Attraction
Attraction (Photo credit: Scott.Paterson)

“One of the best ways to uncover some of those long-hidden wants is to pretend.”

Yes!  This is a fancy way of saying, “Fake it until you make it.”  And why shouldn’t we?  A few years back I read “The Secret” which is all about the Law of Attraction.

Whatever your predominant thoughts are, you best believe that stuff is going to happen. Don’t believe me?  Have you ever driven to work (running late of course) and all that is on your mind is awful traffic along with foxhole prayers for no red lights?  And what happens?  Red lights and crazy traffic. UGH.

Yeah, I’ve been there, too!

Sometimes I envision great things for myself.  No, I still haven’t woken up looking like Julia Roberts, but I have noticed that when I pretend things are going to turn out awesome, they almost always do.

Sometimes I pretend that I am a bigtime writer for Rolling Stone magazine.  While that hasn’t happened yet, I am now writing about music for three websites.  Am I getting paid? Nope!  But I have my eye on the prize and I am loving what I am doing.

Have you ever tried positive thinking?  How did it work out for you?

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F.E.A.R.

I was working with one of my sponsors a few weeks ago, and she told me this phrase.  I almost fell out of my chair.  There are a few acronyms for “FEAR” such as: F*ck Everything And Run and Face Everything And Recover.  But… False Evidence Appearing Real is the one that works best for me. I have a lot of fear in everything I do.  Or should I say, everything I don’t do.  Fear holds me back in many decisions.  Is that why I am so damn indecisive?

Umm… definitely.

There have been times I felt the fear and did it anyway.  Like, the first time I rode a motorcycle, or a roller coaster, or stood up for myself in junior high school when I got in a fist fight.  There was definitely a lot of fear in those instances, but I did it anyway.  Ok, maybe getting in a fist fight is not the best example… The point is, I felt the fear and pushed through it.

A lot of us as children were afraid of the dark.  I remember when I was a little girl, I was afraid of my closet.  I swore to everything that there was a monster waiting to eat me.  The false evidence was the creeks from behind the closet door.  The fear appeared real because I believed it.  I would jump up and turn the light on, go look inside the closet and hey… no monster!  Imagine that.  The false evidence had appeared very real.

I am going through a major life change in the next six weeks.  I decided I need to leave my boyfriend.  We met in recovery a couple of months after I got sober.  He has done a lot for me and we have been through some great times.  But I see the big picture and it is pretty blank.  I won’t go into the sordid details (although it would make for some interesting reading).  Let’s just leave it in the “we grew apart” ditch.

Fear is absolutely a healthy emotion in certain situations.

So I have to be out by December 1st! How will I do it? Who the hell knows… I have faith in God, in my program and in myself that I will pull through this.

Have you ever pushed through the fear? How did you overcome? Share your thoughts and stories below! 

Ten Tips to Success in the Office

We are all guilty of violating the following ten rules of being a great office assistant at one time or another.  You live you learn, right?  How about: you live and you don’t get the promotion or the raise?  Quite a hard lesson!

1- Be pleasant.

Always be pleasant.  You may be having a really bad day.  You may have been stuck in traffic, recently broke up with your mate or maybe you are even PMSing.  This is of no matter to anyone you work with or any of the clients you come in contact with throughout your day.  Your job is to make the jobs of those you work with easier.  If you have an understanding boss, perhaps you could call, text or email him or her and just say, “Hey, I am going to be about 15 minutes late.”  You want to be in the best frame of mind possible when dealing with clients and your coworkers.  So does your boss.

2- Pay attention!

Not paying attention or trying to juggle our personal lives with work always shines through in one way or another in our completed tasks.  It is so crucial in these days of texts, tweeting and status updates that we keep up on the minute details of our projects.  Getting lost in the abyss of personal goings on in our lives can keep us from remaining focused. I once was in tears one day (un-work related) while working on an important project and my boss called me in his office and asked me what the hell was going on.  Clearly my boss could see that I was not focused.  Your boss can see the same!

3- Ask so you don’t look incompetent.

We’ve all been there.  Not quite knowing the gist of a report or project and due to embarrassment or pride decided to wing it instead of asking for more clarification.  This is not a good idea!  If your boss is super busy (which most are or they would not need us) the last thing he or she wants is a shotty letter, report or spreadsheet that they have to go over and splash with red ink because you didn’t get clear directions.  Repeat back to them what they have asked you to do in your own words.

4- Be punctual!

It seems to me as the weeks turn to months and the months turn to years there is more and more traffic on the road!  More cars, trucks, buses and motorcycles along with all of the work vehicles on the road can lead to a bumper to bumper fiasco in the hours of the morning (or afternoon).  Be sure to give yourself some extra time in the morning so that you don’t feel rushed.  Hollering at neighboring traffic gets your blood pressure up and now you’ve started your day on the wrong foot before even putting it in the office.

5- Dress for the office, not for the nightclub.

We all want to look good.  It is one of our basic instincts as women to look attractive.  There is, however a wallop of a difference between looking hot for the office and looking like you are trying to score in a nightclub.  Wearing too tight clothes, short skirts and shirts that are cut so low that one of your girls could pop out and say “Hey there!” at any given moment is a recipe for disaster (not to mention now being labeled “that girl”).  We are definitely judged by our appearance and we all know we can look mega hot and professional at the same time!  If you are constantly adjusting your clothes, you may need to adjust your work wardrobe!

6- Own It

To err is human, to fess up, divine.  Don’t push the blame.  Your co-workers will still be there the next day with the icy glare.  You’ll feel better if you own up to your mistakes not to mention being respected by those with whom you share the office.  Most likely, your boss will trust you now that he sees you admit your mistakes.

7- Eating

Isn’t it always the way; you just put that granola bite in your mouth and the phone rings!  We know how we are supposed to be snacking healthy.  It seems all of those healthy snacks sans yogurt are loud!  If you can, try to take time out for your crunchy snacks with the down time of the phone or take smaller bites.

8- Turn down… the radio!

Although you might be dishing on the latest by Lady Gaga or jamming some classic rock the entire office may feel differently about what they might want to listen to.  Try to keep the tunes or talk radio to a dull murmur.  If your work roomies can hear clearly from 10-12 feet away, chances are you’re rocking out a little too hard!

9- Don’t Be The Only One Laughing

Ahh… the electric chain letter.  Scroll down, make a wish, cross your eyes and oh yeah, send this to one hundred people in thirty seconds or your life will suck.  We all get them and are guilty of sending them as well.  While some chain e-mails are funny, the truth is they can be inappropriate for the office.

10- GO TO LUNCH

Take a break already!  It is so important that you give yourself some recharge time.  Try to eat lunch away from your desk.  Go for a walk if you are fortunate enough to be able to get out of the office.  If not, be sure to get away from your desk for at least 15 – 20 minutes at some point in the day.