Saintly Sinner

 

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Image: pixabay – geralt

Saintly.

We use that term when we speak of good deed doers, animal rescuers and people who keep their cool in Wal-Mart. But what about the saintly sinner? You know, humans that want to beat the ever living shit out of that asshole in Wal-Mart or impale the driver doing 35 in a 55 (this happened to me on my way to work today). Then maybe played the scenario out in vivid detail, and thought, “Is this jerk really worth ten years in prison with a seven-foot cellmate named Tiny?”

Saintly sinners are people just like you and me. They are not good deed doers per say, but they aren’t rotten bastards either. Saintly sinners are average people who go about their day not necessarily keeping tabs of all the good and bad shit they have done, but know that being a decent human – or at least trying like hell – can be a full-time job all its own in this day and age.

Saintly sinners are anti-heroes.

You know, those ten-dimensional characters like John McClaine in Die Hard or Snake Plissken in Escape From New York. Sure they’re mouthy, dirty bad boys who ventured onto the left-hand path, but we love them despite their sinner ways; they’re our angels of redemption.

On the flip side of that, some people pretend to be saintly but are really demon spawn at a sickening level. The technical term for that person is the sociopathic narcissist, and though I have dealt with one version or the other in my life, the evilest combination of the two was my ex-mother-in-law. She would gorge herself on the pain of others. Some people call them emotional vampires, others call them toxic, but I just wound up calling her a crazy b***h. The woman wasn’t happy unless she was witnessing/talking about/causing someone’s pain.

I won’t go into it because she isn’t worth the weight of her memory, but she is included in my memoir. Sometimes we need to speak the devil’s name so we can put her in her proper place.

Saintly is the way

The sinners love to sleep

They gorge on your demons

With gentle little dreams

Their thoughts heavily fasten

To all that’s good and true

Then rip it from your soul

Like gorging sinners do

So wrap your dreams up tight

In a silky woven ball

Wash them in starlight

And let them gently fall

via Daily Prompt: Saintly

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/gorge/

*I had the wrong prompt. This post may be a lame attempt at recovery, but I had to give it a shot!

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Brave: A State of Mind

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Image: Pixabay

To be brave. What does it take? I think most of us are brave every day. We just don’t bring it up. There is, after all, not much humility in bragging about a character asset. There is a hashtag going around –  #metoo – in order to spread awareness about sexual harassment.

Not many people want to talk about being a victim, but we kind of have to talk about it. Awareness is a biggie in helping others and it is oh so brave to share a painful shame-filled story. Of course, it hurts… it hurts when I share my pain, but I know deep in my soul it helps almost as much.

Bravery isn’t planned. It just happens. The bravest this to be is unapologetically yourself. Every f**king day. Just be you. It is a wonderful thing. Be brave and say NO. Be brave and say YES. Be brave and just effing be YOU.

‘And it harm none, do what ye will’

Everyone should live by that rede. The world would be amazing if we would. It is braver to do the right thing that it is to be part of the crowd.

You told me I was brave

As you looked the other way

I had no way out

But had so much to say

I was just a child

And you were quite a man

You held my whole world

In the palm of your beastly hand

Now I am much wiser

As I look around the world

I am no longer a victim

No longer that little girl

*This is not my best writing, but I am dealing with a migraine today… Have a beautiful day my friends. ❤

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/brave/

via Daily Prompt: Brave

 

Synchronize Yourself

Image: Pixabay

Synchronize your mind

You can do it

Get it in order

Like flying birds and planes

Or bugs on the waves

Make everything happen

At exactly the same time

In exactly the same way

Determination

Strength

Tenacity

You can do it

Write that book

Sing that song

Build that house

Take that trip

Quit that job

Follow your heart

Follow that dream

The world is yours. 

The Daily Post: Synchronize

Glaring Defects

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Glaring defects of character

Emblazoned in my soul

How can I forge ahead

All these lies that I have told

The deeds; unkind and dirty

They swirl around my mind

Can I ever be human again

Where’s the peace I need to find

A death warrant appendage

The darkness it’s so foreboding

My skin crawls with sickened rage

Character defects still glowing

One day at a time

That’s what they always say

One second at a time

That’s how I live today.

 

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/glaring/

Symphony Inside

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Image: Pixabay

What do I hear, but the sound of love

Love that binds; love that blooms

Love that sounds like heaven

A symphony in my mind

That touches my soul

And consumes my heart

Flowers bloom as I walk by

Birds chant and smile at me

They sense it, too

Love, sweet love

A symphony in my spirit

That swallows my sadness

And bursts with joy

I know you feel it too

The wind on your skin

The scent in your nostrils

The taste on your lips

The bubbling in your soul

A symphony of love

All you have to do is exhale

And let go…

via Daily Prompt: Symphony

Traditional Drunk

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Image: Pixabay – Stevebidmead

Traditional drunk

Wretched and sorry; blank stare

Last one; I promise

Gosh, there were so many times I cried that it was my ‘last one.’ And I meant it every time I said it, for sure.

But the next day would come and after all the puking and the hangover and the shame, I would forget about the bad times and remember the good.

So there I went out the door, to the local bar to do it all over again. Only this time I swore it would be different. This time I would drink something else. After all, it wasn’t a drinking problem I had, it was a vodka problem I had. Oh, and maybe if I did some ‘other stuff’ while I drank, things would be better…

What?!

The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result. So, in my defense, I was completely insane. What sane person would continue behavior that led to bad outcomes? How could anyone think I was in my right mind after puking my guts up in the bar bathroom and walking out and back over to the bar for another drink?

Traditional drunk. I was anything but.

***

I am still busy with school work!  Midterms are next week. Philosophy class is going well and I am enjoying the discussions. My CIS (computer information systems) class is interesting. I know a lot about computers, but am learning more about Windows and Office 2016.

Hope everyone had an awesome weekend! I will see y’all around blog town. ❤

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/traditional/