Hey all.. I hope that you are all shiny and well and that you have been kicking major arse on whatever you got going on. I want to apologize for falling off the radar for the last couple months… it seems all writing and reading without working a solid program and keeping myself in a good place left me kind of angry and hostile.
But I am back. I just found a new sponsor last night.. I have seen her around for a little while and I really like what she has. I also discovered al-anon. I went to my first ever meeting of that sort Wednesday night and just… wow. It’s amazing the things we realize when we shut up and really listen.
So, here is what I discovered in the last couple months while adjusting to living life on life’s terms.
I have no control over anyone.
I can’t tell people what to do; I can make suggestions.
If something/someone makes me feel bad, I need to see my part in it FIRST, and then take action.
Seeing my part in all the stuff that has happened to me has really done wonders. At first, I blamed everyone for my life. Right down to my children! How crazy is that? When I realized that I have a part in how people treat me (how I let them treat me) and that I can stand up for myself…man, let me just say: HUGE EXHALE.
Children are innocent victims of their circumstances, but as we grow older there comes a point in which we become responsible for our lives….
Living Life on Life’s Terms: Life just keeps on happening. It doesn’t stop. There is no Pause or Rewind button. There is no: “wait, this can’t happen to me! I’m not ready!”
There are two choices: either change the circumstances or change the self. If we don’t change the self, chances are we’ll wind up back in similar circumstances.
So I was successful in keeping with the editing process. So far there are two parts I highlighted and made notes on that basically it sucked and I had to go back and revise it when I was finished on my “seek & destroy” mission of editing all the unlikable parts of my WIP. I am up to page 104 of 188 and hope to be finished before the month is over. I am off Monday, so a big chunk of time will go to this.
I went to a meeting Friday night and got my six-year coin. 😀 It was a proud moment. It is an odd feeling not feeling right or comfortable in my own skin for most of my life and the first part of my sobriety. But, as I shared Friday night, I realized, I am extremely comfortable in my own skin these days and really like who I am.
It is hard to explain to someone who doesn’t know what I mean. I love me! And not in that “look at me! look at me!” way. More like: I am so comfortable with myself these days that I don’t have to pretend to be someone I am not to get people to like me. I am being true to who I am and that is so important to propel forward in a positive way!
Continue editing. I am keeping with this goal.
Make meetings. I made two AA meetings this week!
Triberr 2 – 3 times a week. I did two this week. I go down the whole page til I share all posts – it takes a while.
Comment on blogs. I am not really doing this as much as I used to (I burned myself out). But I am commenting on about ten – twenty blogs a week and try to comment on different ones.
Come up with a few ideas for my lagging “Flash Fiction Friday” posts. Truth is, I have had zero ideas wrapped in a blanket of nothing.
That’s what I got so far! How are you coming along with your goals?
Ya know, sometimes I wonder what the heck life is all about really. Sometimes I feel like it is one big joke of oxymorons, coincidences and irony. I really do try to gather the positive out of every situation, however, I am in a situation now and I am laughing because it is so sad. I won’t go into detail on my blog here, but let’s just say, WTF?!
Okay.. thanks for letting me share.
I have continued to review/edit my current WIP. I am up to page 50 of 188. If I do five pages a day over the next 30 days I will finish by July 4th! Also, I put a shout out to anyone who wanted to beta read it for me. The work is a crime drama with sex, murder drugs and language. So if anyone is into that or isn’t offended by such things, shoot me an email at firstname.lastname@example.org.
In other news, my ATV injuries are healing well with the exception of my left shoulder. No biggie… it will be where it is supposed to be eventually.
On With The Show
continue to edit WIP. Five pages a day. Finish this!
Continue to read/comment blogs (I have slacked on this immensely, I am truly, truly sorry).
Triberr: Three times a week.
Read Shay Fabbro’s Dangerous Reflections! It sounds very interesting.
That’s it for me… what say you? How are you coming along with your goals?